6 - Amnity and Emnity

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[Monday, May 16, 2163]

[Location Undisclosed > Butterscotch Headquarters > Section L > Emilia and Allison’s Quarters > 09:12]

Allison turned and glanced at her bedside table, which she was certain was not there before she… lost consciousness. She sank into her thoughts for a moment, as the last things she remembered were: her… not in bed… and looking for non-armored pajamas that she had yet to put on. She was laying in bed wearing duckie pajamas and found that she was quite neatly tucked in, so much so that it made getting out of bed more loathsome than usual.

She glanced at the note next to an injection gun which said: “Take this for the headache”. She did so and then noticed the leftover muffins from yesterday. They did not remain there for long as her stomach alerted her that she had missed at least one recent meal.

She’d finished her simple breakfast and finally managed to escape the clutches of her bedsheets. Her feet landed on a pair of what she found to be adorable and unsurprisingly… duckie slippers.

She made her way to the closet as the realization hit her that she didn’t exactly have clothing options. Her previous clothes were damaged and she was unsure if they would ever be returned, nor was she sure if she’d even want them back. This train of thought abruptly halted when a completely human-in-appearance Emilia exited the shower. Allison briefly mused over Emilia’s level of waterproofing before realizing the absurdity of questioning such about a human. She dropped the matter altogether after remembering that they’d showered together previously.

Emilia, wrapped in a towel, seemed slightly surprised that Allison was awake and simply stated “There are a few clothes for you to choose from on the left side of the closet. They should fit. We’ll get actual measurements today, so you’ll just have to deal with it for now if they aren’t the right size. Also, sorry about your previous clothes. They’re being washed and altered.”

Allison’s mouth went agape. “How do you even manage this? Stuff just appears. I thought this was a secret type of agency, not a house of illusionists! And why ‘altered’?”

“Who said we can’t be both? Also, It’s not like I don’t have help. You’ll figure it out eventually. As for the clothes, they were damaged, and unless you have a fondness for baggy clothing, they didn't fit you in the first place.”

“Right…”

“We’ll discuss that later. We have actual important stuff to deal with. You have an evaluation in 15 minutes. Pick out some clothes, unless you’d rather wear pajamas.”

The suddenness of this revelation caused Allison’s trains of thought to derail simultaneously and she entered the walk-in closet, picking the first non-pajama outfit she could find, a tank top and cargo pants “OK, I’m dressed, now what?”

She exited the closet to see that Emilia had already dried herself and was changed, leaning against the wall by the door “We get going, duh.” The door slid open and Emilia peeked outside before rapidly retreating into the room. She removed her left hand and tossed it to Allison. “You know the drill, same as yesterday. Conrad is in the same place. He’s looking for Jesse most likely.”

“Why am I the one who has to take care of this!?”

“Cuz I said so for one, cuz I’m the one evaluating you for two, and cuz I’m your superior and that’s official as of 01:37 this morning. Also, you are technically a prisoner until you finish all of your evaluations. That was on page 113, which is just after you stopped asking for me to tell you ‘the important shit’.”

“Well fuck. You’ll help if I need it, right?” Allison asked nervously.

“I might, but I might not. Just remember team rule number one. You do remember that one, right?”

“I believe it was ‘don't die’, wasn’t it?”

Emilia nodded and Allison continued “I think that is everyone’s rule number one.”

Emilia nodded, “Then you should already be good at it. Now go ruin his shit.”

Allison sighed and walked up to the door, hand-in-hand with Emilia’s gun. The door opened slowly and silently as if it knew what Allison was thinking. She seized the opportunity provided by the door and peeked into the hallway. She steadied her breathing and took aim, then squeezed Emilia’s finger, firing a dart straight into Conrad’s neck.

Conrad winced in pain and glared at Allison. “Fuck… you…” He fell to the ground in a sleeping heap of human shortly thereafter.

[Monday, May 16, 2163]

[Location Undisclosed > Butterscotch Headquarters > Section L > Hallway > 09:26]

Emilia exited the room upon Allison’s successful handling of the apparently unwanted guest. Allison casually returned Emilia’s hand and Emilia tossed Conrad over her shoulders, then started walking down the corridor and asked simply “You comin’?”

Allison hastily followed Emilia down the hallway for some tens of meters before encountering Jessica, David, Aaron, Jesse, and Michelle. They nodded at each other in place of words and no one seemed to think twice about Emilia carrying an unconscious person across her shoulders.

It was Allison who broke the silence. “Uhm, hi? So, what am I supposed to be doing, and what about this Conrad guy? What’s his problem anyway?”

Michelle glanced at her, raising an eyebrow, “You’re inquisitive. Tell you what, for each evaluation you pass, one of us will answer one question. You also get 1 per day, but it's use it or lose it. As for a failure penalty, I haven’t thought of one yet, but I’m certain someone will. Your first evaluation is firearms proficiency.”

“I get penalized for failing? Wait… FIREARMS!? You’re going to give me guns!?”

Michelle responded, “I assumed you’d have read the thing that you initialed 69 times, signed 30 times, and applied a blood seal to.”

Allison gulped, realizing that she, once again, missed some vital information while Michelle spoke. “You should’ve been aware that you are considered a prisoner until you pass field evaluations. There are 7 in total. You need to pass at least 5 of them.” Allison shuddered at the thought of what could happen to her if she didn’t pass the required number of evaluations. Michelle continued speaking as if she was aware of Allison’s musings. “You’ll have that question answered once you read the contract portion of the handbook. If you manage to pass enough evaluations, you should have a decent enough idea of how things are for us. Once you get that far, we’ll have to have a nice… long… chat.” 

“Why does that sound so ominous…?” 

David answered next while wearing a friendly smile “We’re Team Lambda. Most things we say or are involved in are ominous, suspicious, or just plain strange. You’ll get used to it if you live long enough.”

Allison couldn't help but smile back… until the last sentence when she felt a jealous gaze upon her, immediately followed by a feeling of impending disaster. Moving on instinct alone, she dropped low and narrowly avoided a knife that would’ve ended up mere millimeters from her throat. Her attacker remained within striking range, as they lunged at her. Allison didn't pay the distance any attention and simply saw a ‘person with a knife in attack mode’, and responded accordingly.

Following her dodge with some sort of breakdancing move, she spun on the ground and kicked the back of her would-be assailant’s knee. The person fell to one knee, and Allison was already following-up by raising herself and launching another kick to the back of their head. 

The kick was blocked by Jesse, who shook his head slowly. David had already made his way to her assailant and had her in… more of an embrace than any type of restraining move. Allison finally realized that the one who attacked was none other than her supposed teammate, Jessica. She could do nothing but shudder at the sheer levels of hatred and killing intent radiating from her.

Jessica spoke in a low, threatening tone, “If she fails, she’s going for 5 minutes with me in ‘the pit’. No holds barred!”

Allison’s jaw dropped “What the hell is with this friendly fire?!”

Jessica roared in reply “Listen, bitch. David is MINE! If you even so much as bat an eyelash in his direction, I’ll ruin you. You are our PRIS-ON-ER! There’s no such thing as friendly fire, only collateral damage, and garbage.”

Allison stood momentarily stunned by the sheer levels of derision addressed to herself. The best she could manage was muttering “What the fuck”?!

Michelle sighed “Fine, but it won't be for today.”

Coming back to her senses, Allison could finally voice a complaint. “How can this even be allowed? Prisoners are supposed to be treated with some level of dignity and humanity under international law! You’re evaluating me… WITH FIREARMS for fuck’s sake! How the hell can you even consider me as mere collateral damage when you’re trusting me with guns?!”

“Oh no, you’re definitely garbage” Jessica muttered.

Michelle stepped in, “Shut it, chibi-chan!” After confirming that Jessica was now seething at herself instead of Allison, she continued. “You’re familiar with the concept of a ‘suicide squad’, right?”

Allison raised an eyebrow. “Yeah. The concept I’m not such a fan of, but I love movies, books, and games with that sort of theme.”

Michelle grinned. “How about that, a woman of taste. Yeah, you’re the charismatic gunner right about now. That’s how this is allowed. You just have slightly better prospects for survival and actual career advancement.”

Allison sighed “Alright. Fair enough. So, what do I have to do? If I pass, I don’t have to worry with that ‘pit’ thing, right?”

“That’s the spirit, though you will probably end up in there with her at some point, so you’ll have to prepare yourself.”

Allison shrugged “Oh, that’s future me’s problem. About giving me guns though, are you sure that’s a good idea?”

Michelle grinned. “Are you saying it’s a bad idea?” and tilted her head in Emilia’s direction. Emilia immediately discarded Conrad like a sack of potatoes and her right arm showed itself in its ’normal’ rifle form. Her left hand was pointed like a finger pistol but was much more dangerous as Allison had used the weapon herself on multiple occasions already. Each of these weapons was pointed at her.

Michelle then nodded in Jesse’s direction. Matching pistols glowing with red LEDs were now pointed at her. She glanced over at David and Jessica. David had a knife in one hand and a pistol in the other. Jessica had drawn a katana, from where Allison could only speculate.

Michelle was standing poised to throw a total of 8 knives. Aaron was just standing around doing nothing. Upon noticing Allison’s gaze, he simply shrugged “I’m here for entertainment.”

Michelle followed up “Most of us are here for amusement or cuz we need to be, but as you can see, we’re pretty well covered here. Hell, we’re a bigger threat to each other than you are to any of us, except maybe Jessica after that last display.”

Jessica growled and lunged with the katana, Allison jumped back and 3 knives flew between her and her charging teammate/captor. The first dagger flew in front of Jessica’s face with very little room to spare. The second bounced off of the katana, slightly disrupting its position. The hilt of the third dagger hit the back of Jessica’s left knee in exactly the same place Allison hit before, sending Jessica toppling over to the ground. A fourth dagger was able to deflect the katana’s blade, keeping it from causing injury to anyone. Allison glanced in the direction the daggers came from to see Michelle, still poised to throw, and with half the number of knives she had previously.

Michelle sighed “OK, so Jessica has a bit of a temper in some situations, though i’m sure you’ve already noticed. What’s worse is that she apparently doesn’t like you. It’s probably best for you to stay away from her. Anyway, It’s time for the evaluation to begin. You will be tested on one-handed ranged weapons and a couple of other things. There will always be at least 1 person aiming at you should you get any bright ideas. Ready to begin?”

“No… no I am not.”

“Good, cuz you’re going into that room over there”. Michelle pointed to a rather easy-to-overlook door just beside them. She opened the inconspicuous door and motioned for Alison to enter.

Allison looked at the small broom-closet-sized room suspiciously, “Uhm, why?”

Michelle shrugged, “Your outfit has been vetoed. Now get in the box.” Allison was unceremoniously, and quite literally, kicked into the room by Michelle’s rather small foot, and the door closed behind her.

[Monday, May 16, 2163]

[Location Undisclosed > Butterscotch Headquarters > Section L > broom closet? > 09:31]

The door locked behind Allison and the interior lighting of the room switched on.

Allison muttered to herself, “Who vetoed my clothes, and why didn't anyone say anything earlier?”

The rhetorical question was met with an answer, from Rinoa.

<<You have not yet been equipped with the means to communicate with me directly. It was I who rejected your clothing choice, out of safety concerns.>>

“It was either this or Emilia's pajamas.”

<<From both a coverage and utility standpoint, Emilia's armored pajamas are objectively the superior choice. Your tank top leaves your upper chest and arms exposed. While the cargo pants are not a poor choice, they could be used to hide weapons. Given your current designation, this is also unacceptable.>>

Allison stood in a bit of a stupor, well, what am I supposed to wear then?”

<<Remove your clothes.>>

“I'm not going in just underwear.”

<<Based on everything I just said, I would not have you do something so foolish or indecent.>>

“...then?”

<<Wait a moment. I am currently procuring your clothing.>>

“O…K?” A few moments later, noises of something shifting behind wall panels. Soon after, a panel in the wall opened and Rinoa’s choice of clothing was displayed. Allison’s eyes opened wide in shock, then her expression turned to anger.

“That outfit is convict orange!” She reached and picked it up. “A prison jumpsuit?! Are you kidding me?!”

<<It will fit, keep bullet casings from hitting skin directly, and denotes your position as a captive. There is even a shank made from a toothbrush hidden somewhere in there.>>

“You’re serious aren’t you?”

<<I just gave you a prisoner’s jumpsuit and explained why it’s a good choice. You were even provided an appropriate makeshift weapon. I thought I was doing you a favor.>>

“You’re going to be hard to argue with.”

<<Yes. Consider that the first lesson from me and take the advice of NOT arguing with an advanced A.I.>> The door unlocked and Allison was released into the hallway after she finished changing.

[Monday, May 16, 2163]

[Location Undisclosed > Butterscotch Headquarters > Section L > Some hallway > 09:39]

Jessica burst into laughter and Michelle smirked before speaking, “Ready now?”

“Somehow, I feel even less ready than I did before…” Allison whined.

“Suck it up buttercup! Yo Bubba, open the doors already you hillbilly bastard!”

Allison showed surprise yet again as a voice she hadn’t heard before responded over a loudspeaker. It took her a moment to make sense of the country manner of speech.

“Michelle, you is all sorts of rude. Ain’t like no lady at all. You mus’ be Allison. Nice ta meetcha. I’m Bubba-Billy-Joe-Bob Alexander Thorton… The Third. You can call me Bubba. Welcome to my sanctuary, the ballistics testin’ ground.”

With those words, What looked like a blank section of wall at the end of the corridor opened. It was as if the hallway itself continued directly into another room seamlessly. The smell of smoke and gunpowder made their presence known to Allison’s nose and the heat from the room embraced everyone present. Allison could not help but feel like it was the aftermath of a battleground stuffed into a box.


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